I've always wanted to have kids. For many reasons, i suppose. I even had names for the lil' rascals set aside (considering my spouse agreed, of course). There was my boy Matthew Brian. Then there was lil' Nicholas Andrew. I've also liked the names Caleb, Melissa, Samantha, and Justin. All cute names, I think.I love Angel's blog because I know that 9 times out of 10 I will end up smiling, giggling, or bursting out in laughter - not to mention the "awwww" - after reading one of her posts. She's got such a wonderful family and I love it when she talks about her kids. There was the one about the lizard. There was that hilarious one about the velociraptor in church. And of course there was the cute one about the elmo suitcase.
I've mentioned before in a previous post called "Hope of Having Children" that I was a bit concerned about whether or not i'd be able to have natural born children of my own if I came to the conclusion that gay relationships in the context of commitment, love, monogamy, and faithfulness were acceptable. I know many gay couples that have kids who have adopted. Even before I started this journey of mine, I had been thinking that in addition to kids with my wife we could adopt as well. Lord knows how many kids are in need out there.
Geek Boi wrote a post that got me thinking about kids again. What would I have to give up to have kids? I've grown accustomed to living on my own and having my own space (especially since I was able to get my own apartment again). For starters, i'd have to give up sleep. Many friends of mine tell me about the staying up at 3AM because the little bugger won't fall asleep. I'd definitely be grocery shopping differently. I typically get healthy foods anyway but I'm sure i'll be getting lots more of the "fun" foods. Of course, there's the taking the kids to school and picking them up. There's the talking about our day at school or work conversations that we'll be having. I'm typically pretty patient but I suppose i'll also have to get used to the crying, then the whining. And i'm sure there's much much more to give up and to gain and to look forward to.
Whatever it was that I'd have to give up, adjust to, or learn, I'd gladly do it to be a good parent. Whether I'm raising them with a 'he' or a 'she', I pray I won't be doing it alone. That's a chapter in my life journey that I'm definitely looking forward to.
2 comments:
Awww Thank you for the sweet words Eric, I needed that today :*)
You will make an awesome parent, I'm sure of it.
Eric, have you ever heard of the voluntary human extinction movement? I know it sounds a bit harsh, but I advocate that people do not reproduce. I know a missionary that is serving in uganda and people are really suffering there. They go with out food, and clothing, books and toys, and definitely electronics. I would encourge you to pour your love out into Uganda. It has been experiencing the world's largest neglected humanitarian crisis for 20 years. If you are interested, you can learn more about it on the missonary link on my blog under africa postcards.
I am a single mother. I was not planning to be one. My marriage fell apart when I entered the one holy catholic apostolic church. I am glad it fell apart. It was a relationship formed in the world, not in the church. But now I have a daughter to raise outside the context of marriage, and that is very painful.
Given the formidable opposition to gay marriage right now, I would encourage you to postpone your decision until things settle down...think about what kind of world you would be bringing your children into if you did do this. It would not be easy. Are you ready for this?
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