(Boy am I glad I'm not in the middle of all that mess! I'm loving life in the hot zone right about now.)

Leave them the hell alone! Goodness. I heard Brennan Manning speak last Sunday and he said a classic phrase, "Don't should on me!" (or in other words, "Don't sh*t on me!"). Should, should, should.... geez, if I were my friends who were in this romantic relationship, i'd be feeling claustrophobic. Back off and let us breathe!
Can you imagine what these "church friends" would say to me if I ever was in a gay relationship and was open about it? Out of concern for my well-being or even state of spiritual cleanliness, I should....blah, blah, blah. I think they need to quit looking for the errors in other people's relationships and start evaluating the kind of love that they are demonstrating in their own relationships - not just the romantic ones but their friendships as well. How loving can they really be towards their friends if they are constantly pointing out what's wrong in the romantic relationship?
"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." 1 Corithians 13:4-5
My friend, "E" over at Paradoxy has a great post talking about "Conditional Love". He makes a really good point when he says, "...but by and large I've learned that I still have to be very selective about who I open up to. So when did it become okay for the church to be such an unsafe place?"
Granted, I'm suggesting that these people (my friends) "need to" or "should" back off. But how about we trust Jesus a little bit more to shape His own people rather than taking it upon ourselves to bend them? How about we trust that Jesus transforms lives, paradigms, and lifestyles through process rather than focusing on the fact that they are "living in sin" now and so they must change now - or else we shall intervene!
I'm sure there are some friends out there that have learned about my journey of exploring what it looks like to be both gay and Christian and that they are perhaps "concerned for me". The securing thing for me is knowing that Jesus is with me here on this journey. He loves me and knowing that allows me to trust Him completely. I trust Him enough to guide me and let me know if I'm walking away from Him and so if i'm making a mistake by walking this journey, i'll eventually be led out of the journey. In the mean time, i'm learning and growing in my faith and in my understanding of His love and utter grace for "my" marginalized community. So this gives me the freedom to live out my faith with confidence and without fear of judgment (1 John 4:16-19).
I believe in fellowship and community. I believe in sharpening and challenging each other to grow and be better disciples of Jesus. But there's got to be a point to where we release ourselves from the burden of legislating the logistics of our relationships and we simply love in our relationships. Love God. Love each other. The other commandments will take care of themselves.
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